Engineering lessons Part 2—Living alone is hell.

Its an all time fact that marriage in our country is mandatory for every citizen…not because its in the law but because it’s a social compulsion. But why is it so…? Why is everybody so eager to sentence life imprisonment to two approximately innocent souls before they commit the crime of ruining each other’s life…first get punished and then get crooked…harsh. But the saying is still very true…”Shadi ka laddoo…jo khaye wo bhi pachhtaye, jo na khaye wo bhi pachhtaye”.


It was the end of first year and I had screwed up everything. First year results…shameful, physical exercise…nil, diet…improper. I was living with an unhealthy mind in an unhealthy body hence an unhealthy decision was taken…of leaving the college hostel. I was not the only one to leave the hostel but since the decision was late I had no partner to share a flat with. So I began searching for a reasonable PG and I got one. Rs. 2500/- for a room and 3 daily meals per month. Good enough…Get, Set and Go.

“Living alone is going to be so productive for me…studies, exercise and guitar, everything with no one around to disturb or get disturbed…I am going to make the most out of myself for the first time in my life.” Such was my mindset when I started living alone. I was excited…getting up early in the morning, get ready, take breakfast, go to college, come back, take snacks and tea, go to the room, take some rest, do some strumming, take dinner, study and go to bed. There was no problem with this routine but I could continue it only for a week, all the enthusiasm started fading, I started skipping my breakfast due to laziness, getting late for college, reach back really tired and sleep for too long…no more music in life, open the book but studying wasn’t necessary anymore…wondering why? I could not have discovered the actual reason if I had not taken that unhealthy decision. There was no one to appreciate, no one to motivate, no one to compete with and no one to compare. Life is meaningless without relativity. If you achieve the ultimate in something you will lose interest in it because there is nothing else to work upon. If you are running alone in the race, why would you run? Hence you will start slowing down, start declining and eventually get destroyed. Well practically its not that facile…you will definitely start living again before you die. And the solution is…you should find a partner.


Man is the only social animal…strength or weakness? It’s both because every coin has two faces. Being social man can extract magnificence out of dust…that’s strength but man can’t live alone…that’s weakness. One must have somebody to take care of…no matter how much that person irritates you or how much you hate him/her…if you are spending your life with that person you can’t stop yourself falling in love with him/her…its human nature…there should be some shoulder to rely upon, somebody who would get worried for you, who would long for you if you are not around, who would listen to you, who would understand, who would irritate as well, somebody whose cute activity would make you giggle, somebody whom you can fight with, in front of whom you can cry and not feel embarrassed, somebody with whom you can be YOU.

Whatever your taste may be straight or non-straight you have to find a partner for yourself. Right now I am living with my friends but its not going to be this way for too long, everybody will get settled down and have their own families. I know that I can’t live alone so very soon I need to find somebody who can tolerate me for the rest of my life…and whom I would also happily tolerate. The search is on…